San Gabriel's Horn

A few weeks ago I went on a respite with some ladies. I had never even heard of this word, respite, let alone knew what it meant. Well, God had a weekend planned to teach me live and in person the definition.

I've been on the traditional women's retreats several times. We all pile in to a car and head off somewhere with no kids, husbands, housework etc. and listen to a speaker teach us a new word from God,.but this retreat, or rather respite, was totally the opposite. This was me and God..... that's it....... no pre-printed fill in the blank sermon notes to go by......just me and him amongst all of his splendor!!

At first I was unsure how this whole thing would work. I have my daily quiet time hour, but this was 2 full days of quiet time...how would I find something to do all by myself for that long? Well, as some know, I struggle with a nasty little word called "control" and, boy oh boy, did my Jesus have plans for me that weekend.

We stayed in a large vacation home, on the San Gabriel River, in Georgetown. It was a huge home; tall ceilings with large open windows over-looking the river and from our bedroom balcony we had the view of God's creation; it was so peaceful. We all gathered a few times each day for worship and meals, but other than that we each put on our tennies, grabbed a blanket & bible then hit the land.

I love the song we sing at church "I lay back against you and breath, feel your heart beat" I have a strong desire for this peacefulness in my life. This verse of this song has brought me through some pretty tough times in life. Well, I was totally overcome with emotion as I walked down to the river and found a huge oak tree. The tree leaned just so, that it made a perfect place to sit and lean back on, as if God, himself, put it there for me. So...... I layed against him and felt his heartbeat for 2 days.

I entered that weekend with a heavy heart with a lot of life issues weighing me down, I was having a hard time understanding where all of this was coming from. I got to thinking, we all have our struggles, you know the ones we have endured forever, and we have found ways to somewhat comfortably cope with them.....but have you ever watched God just flat move one of those struggles out of the way? He has recently done this in my life. Another song I love has a verse that says "He can move a mountain, my God is mighty to save".

Well guess what I learned ..... there are different struggles on the other side of that mountain, and sometimes there things you haven't dealt with before and therefore have no coping methods. Man, this has been humbling to me, that's right where I was. So If I believe my God, not just believe IN Him, then I must lean on him for everything. So that's where my "control" problem comes in. I was stressed out because Tanya was trying to control and fix all the new struggles that had become visible to me.

I went into that weekend stressed, and came out free. The struggles aren't gone, but the stress of trying to figure out all the answers is. So I had to share this with who ever wants to read this and I have inserted some of the pictures from my spot on the river. Each of these pics are the very heartbeat of God and I know I will look at them daily. If you ever have the chance to get away and spend time with him in nature, I would encourage you to do so. And if you need someone to go with, I'm only a phone call away.